We are already whole.
What if there is nothing more that we need to add to ourselves? That the skill lies in harvesting what is already here ? Learning to read the “real messages” we are already giving and receiving – whether they present as pain or joy?
We could then use these messages skillfully to enrich life – ours and others !
This work is not about avoiding pain, it is about connecting to what is really important to us and living FROM that value – each moment, creating more of the world we want to live in.
My passion and intention is to support the introduction, practice and integration of
this great work in an atmosphere of Safety, Respect, Trust and Inclusion.
Kate Raffin is a visual artist who enjoys many forms of communicating.
She is also a trained NVC mediator – Accredited Mediator under the Australian National standards,
a trained facilitator and a certified trainer with the Centre for Nonviolent Communication.
Kate is a Team Animator for www.playinthewild.org – initiations into Nonviolence for youth, families and educators.
Since 2005, Kate has been studying with a wide variety and diversity of local and international trainers, including organising and assisting many of these events. The biggest influences have come from working and studying with Catherine Cadden + Jesse Wiens. It also includes founder of NVC Dr Marshall Rosenberg, Ike Lasater, John Kinyon, Miki Kashtan, Marie Miyashiro + Robert Gonzales.
WHAT PEOPLE HAVE SAID ABOUT KATE’S WORK:
BRIEFLY – this workshop will:
- enrich your life
- open up rich, new avenues for authentic communication
- be refreshing, feels organic
- be fun, deep and inspiring
“Kate, I have been drinking in every moment with you. I find such ease in learning from your use of words, metaphor, illustration + humour and your fluency with the heart of this. Compassionate, emapthic listening for teaching. If you do this workshop, you will gain more than I hope to describe. Trust this workshop will enrich your life” – Chrissy Robb 2017
“I highly recommend this training. Kate is a skilled facilitator who offers a deep experience of NVC techniques and principles. This training opens up rich, new avenues for authentic communication“ – Premkranti, Bega October 2016
“If you truly want to have meaningful communication, do this training” – Piers, Bega 2016
“Refreshing, feels organic, a type of remebering happened for me” – Sharon, Bega 2016
“I highly recommend Kate’s workshops. They are fun, deep and inspiring. It gives me hope for the world. Kate is down to earth, authentic and caring” – workshop participant 2017
” Kate is a true role model, a really authentic communicator. I love her passionate commitment to this work and her boldness and sense of fun.”
” Kate has created a safe place for growth and vulnerability. She brings an air of magic with her that everyone gets to share. I have endless gratitude”.
” It’s not often that I ‘ve been to a workshop conducted by someone with such an open heart and so present. It is much valued.”
” It is particularly wonderful to experience being in a class situation with a teacher/facilitator who was not afraid of being open and vulnerable with the class. There was no pretence that you knew everything Kate, or that you had somehow transcended the kinds of struggles of daily life that we were noticing”
” I took this course as a refresher to one that I had previously completed five or more years ago. This was far more than a refresher ! This course was a fantastic starting point and a continuation and a beginning” – Warren 2013
” I want to say a huge THANK YOU to yourself and the NVC work in providing me with the tools with which I can now communicate.I feel so empowered. I feel good about who I am because I am now speaking form the TRUTH of who I am. I don’t have to cover-up, blame, make wrong or practice other unhealthy ways of communicating and behaviours which I used in the past. It feels so good to practice being a better version of who I am today. Thank you for sharing the gift of NVC with me and being in my life ” – Maria M Sydney, Sept 2013
“Thank you so much for the Heart Talk Matters workshop – Amazing stuff! I had recently read the book but was unsure how to bring it to life, so the practices and guidlines you took us through were very helpful … your heart felt sharings over the weekend are also inspirational, and I welcome your open and relaxed, inclusive style of teaching. Love your beautiful artistic offerings too, – meets my needs for beauty and creativity !” Participant, Heart Talk Matters Hobart 2015.
“A very valuable training that I will be able to take the skills and understandings into my work place of restorative justice and my private life / relationships- skills of empathy, understanding , listening and empathic communication – a very practical workshop – thank you Kate.” Participant, Maleny 2016
‘Feeling inspired to take this work out into the world – in my daily life, in my family and in my work’. Participant, Maleny 2016.
ONE -ON -ONE WORK :
“Working with Kate one on one is always magical. I often walk into the session clouded with confusion and self doubt and so many questions about how to find my way through. By engaging a variety of powerful processes from her many years of experience Kate expertly leads me to the heart of the issue with great skill and care. I leave each session with a practical step to take to fulfill my intention within an appropriate time frame. Time spent with Kate in this way is both empowering and clarifying.” – Cassandra Missio, Co Director and Yoga Teacher, Earth and Sky Yoga Studio Marrickville.
“Thank you for the listening and the excercise that wasn’t just ‘another fancy way of giving empathy’, I mean it was, but it really felt like a learning game and helped me approach my uncertainties with a tool that made me think and feel with more objectivity and understanding“
“Kate Raffin is a gentle, powerful enabler of Dr Marshall Rosenberg’s teachings in communication. Kate is a soul-whisperer whose questions and guidance lead one’s higher self to connect to one’s heart space in the name of Unity.” – Karen Adler 2016.
‘Kate worked with me through four professional coaching sessions. I was feeling stuck about how best to rediscover and then bring forth more of the ‘me’ that wanted to be in the world – those dreams and longings of the heart that had been put on the back-burner or forgotten over the years, while I focused more on family and career. Using very openhearted and creative processes, Kate so kindly helped me to, firstly, name my various talents and skills and then identify the heart’s yearnings and needs. In our last session, we role played a scene, and focused careful attention on the body’s movements to reveal some deeper truths hitherto hidden from conscious awareness. I’m appreciative of Kate’s knowledge of NVC and coaching, her flexibility (both with the timing of sessions and her willingness to guide but not dictate the direction of the sessions) and her overall goodness, which she so generously shares with the world’. – Marie, August 2016.
‘Kate has been a mentor, a mediator, a coach, and a guide for me. Through her presence, curiosity understanding and empathy I am able to connect in with myself, touch my truth and find clarity. She meets me where I am, takes my hand and walks beside me until I find my path again. I am deeply grateful for her presence in this world.
When I think of Kate I think of empathy, understanding, presence, openness, curiosity, creativity and warmth.’ – Kylie Ezyart 2017
MEDIATION / SUPPORTED DIALOGUE:
“I would trust Kate with my own family if conflict arose” – Linda Rysenbry 2017. colleague www.everydaylove.com.au
“I really appreciated your role as intermediary and I guess I woudl say interpreter, when the messages or meaning wasn’t making it through to each other. It was good to slow everything down and try to find ways forward that suited us both when our needs appeared at odds” – Anon April 2017
“As a mediator Kate holds a very safe and present space where each person gets to experience being heard and understood, and creatively we walk towards resolution together. She holds a safe space for something that can often feel so scary to explore.” – Kylie Ezyart 2017
“I felt safe and positive with you in the picture, and had begun to develop much more optimism around how to gently speak my truth.” – Theresa, Chair of a climate change action organisation.
RESTORATIVE CIRCLES/ WORKING WITH GROUPS, COMMUNITIES, FAMILIES:
“When I rang to say “help, can you help us, we are in conflict”, Kate’s priority and ethic was in supporting the sustainability for the community ourselves to step up and trust in what we already have.
It wasn’t until we were right into the process, that I realised what a helpful and long visioned approach she has. Kate brought trust that through the dialogue we would come to a place that we could all agree on – together – the best chance we had. A point of understanding ourselves and the background about what lead us to behave in the ways we did.” – Sunny, Bench-Co op secretary, Bend Community, Bega November 2016
‘I was a raw facilitator (in the first ‘live’ Restorative Circle in our community) and am grateful for the way Kate modelled holding me and the entire process. Her confidence in the process, and her unique way of quietly and firmly reminding me of the importance of reflecting back was inspiring. At the same time, she encouraged flexibility so that we moved with the flow of the circle. Kate was constantly clear that I was the facilitator – she was there for support, not to take over. Her sharp awareness and listening blew me away.
The outcome was stunning! Participants rose to the challenge. We were all moved by the brave honesty and self-knowledge that suddenly and unexpectedly led to oiling the wheels of restoration.
Kate is on top of this process and she has all the skills and aptitude to bring it to communities, groups and work places. I’m excited that these skills and the Restorative Circles process are resources that can be used by humans powerfully with good outcomes anywhere. In Australia, we are blessed to have Kate Raffin to show us how. Thanks Kate!’
– Jenny Spinks – resident at Bend Eco Neighbourhood, Bega. January 2017
“I just wanted to express my heartfelt thanks and gratitude for your input and kindness at our recent Restorative Cirlce. They suggested to trust in the process and lo and behold, magic happens !” – Community member Dec 2016
“Yes ditto, great gratitude to al involved in the Cirlce, in the process I was forced to confront something from 71 years ago + bringing that with me into the cirlce + am very pleased with the outcome helped by all in that circle” – Community member Dec 2016
“To hear the open quality of the conversation after our workshop + realise how far we have progressed on our journey since our first workshop with you is something I wish to share with you. The theme was self responsibility, with more reference to how what I say/do effects others, rather than how they effect me. In gratitude of your support in our growth. We will achieve this.
“I also think of the many oppportunities offered to us and how your strength and focus held us together. Outcomes so far: particular members are openning up more, others are curbing their criticisms, focussing on problems rather than people“ – Jane, Ecovillage member Dec 2016
Trainings offered by Kate Raffin
Kate has been facilitating trainings in a wide variety of places and situations. Including training and working with aged and health care workers, Juvenile Justice, parents, educators, youth, sex workers, special needs university teams. As well as her own family, friends and communities.
NVC MEDIATION – Training in Mediation NVC style
HEART TALK MATTERS – Foundation training in NVC.
Usually 5 x weekly evenings OR 2 full days. Or other combinations of evenings and full days.
HEART TALK MATTERS – Introduction to NVC 2 – 5 hours.
PRACTICE GROUPS – Kate passionately runs ongoing and short course Practice Groups that aim to support the integration of these skills.
RESTORATIVE CIRCLES – Kate co-runs a monthly practice group as an introduction of Restorative Circles. Please contact Kate for the details.
Kate offers private sessions by telephone, skype and in person.
These focus on :
- Conflict Coaching and dialogue support and preparation
- NVC Mediation
- “Harvesting” and moving through road blocks and unhelpful pattens in your life
- Getting to know yourself better – tools for living your life more fully
- Meeting and growing your passions and unique gifts
- Doing the work you love
Mediation, Conflict Coaching, Restorative Circles, Facilitation, Practice Groups and One on One (coaching).
Working with groups of people (2 or more) who come together for a shared purpose. Supporting them to learn and implement tools to navigate and even embrace “road blocks” to get results that are inclusive and work for all.
CONFLICT – one of the most natural things that we will come up against in our lives. What do we do when we find ourselves in conflict ? How do we respond ? We are responding – whether it is to walk out of the room, turn and “battle it out” or call for the support of a mediator. Do we like the results of the choices we are making ? Are these choices contributing to a quality of connection that we are wanting? Or more pain and misunderstanding?
The mediation I offer uses my skills, training and experience in Nonviolent Communication within the facilitative model which I am Nationally accredited in. I focus on supporting each party to be heard to YOUR satisfaction. Then, by connecting to each other and ourselves in this way, you will naturally begin to generate new strategies ( or tweek the old ones) to include the needs of all those involved. The results are often ( nearly always) far from what were first perceived as possible before the mediation.
Of course, conflict effects more than just the 2 people with the most obvious friction and tension. Community and family members are already part of our lives and will most likely benefit from and contribute to having their voice and presence in restorative dialogues. I am seeing the need for this more and more – forums that can hold many voices in the room.
I do not advise or apply pressure for parties to come to decisions. I have full trust in the inherent wisdom and longing to move forward with care that each of us has, especially given the opportunity to hear ourselves and each other.
The number of sessions needed varies depending on your specific circumstances.
It is my passion and conviction to work in the world in this way. I believe as we move into the future we will be reaching higher levels of challenge and therefore a greater need to come together and creatively find new solutions to live sustainably, peacefully and productively. Solutions that tangibly reflect that everyone’s needs matter.
One relationship at a time.